Hell explained

HELL EXPLAINEDThe following is an actual question given on a University of Arizona chemistry mid term, and an actual answer turned in by a student.

The answer by one student was so ‘profound’ that the professor shared it with colleagues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well :

Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle’s Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is compressed) or some variant.

One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving, which is unlikely.. I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let’s look at the different religions that exist in the world today.

Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle’s Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.

This gives two possibilities:

1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over.

So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, ‘It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you,’ and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct….. …..leaving only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting ‘Oh my God.’


Worms from hell…..really.

The question comes to mind today: do you believe in the existence of life on other planets. I will tell you that I do. I cannot look up at the stars at night without thinking about how many planets there are out there surrounding us that present the possibility of having life on them. We are but a speck, a tiny speck. That is not how we view ourselves, I know, but reality is reality. Consider ths article:  Worms from hell unearth possibility for extra-terrestrials.

So, the question is: do you believe in life on other planets? Yes, know, or, gee, I’m not sure.    



after reading the article Worms from Hell, is the possibility of life on other planets. The link is below






Focus on publishing!

Everyday I move closer to having my novel The Prince of Dan published. It currently is just under 106,000 words.

What’s it all about? Murder, incest, insanity, and a healthy dose of confusion over who is really who.

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Best to you, Gordon Kuhn “Poet in the Rain”